


ache.

by fraisesmoothie



Series: unlikely bond. (akechi/haru) [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: i just need to proofread it first, ill post something nice one day i promise, speaking of; this isnt proofread! we die like men, the angst train continues, theres a prequel to this that will be posted at a later date
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:08:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25429687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fraisesmoothie/pseuds/fraisesmoothie
Summary: " Who knew that such kind words could haunt a tortured soul so brutally? "He knows fully well that he hasn't earnt this friendliness.
Relationships: Akechi Goro & Unknown Female Character
Series: unlikely bond. (akechi/haru) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1842514
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	ache.

The grey sky glimmered with speckles of mist and fog, illuminating the area and denying a minority of vision from a straight-forward view. This was his least favourite kind of weather for some occasions - cycling, outdoor interviews, just general life situations - but his most treasured time for contemplating. 

Something about the melancholic, dystopian atmosphere simply drew him in. Perhaps he viewed it as symbolism in regards to himself, his entire being.

Just an unending fog.

He turned away from the wide window, successfully breaking out of his thought process at the same time, but that only led to a different thought.

One he had been trying to avoid ever since the event occurred.

"I...I forgive you, Akechi-kun!".

Who knew that such kind words could haunt a tortured soul so brutally?

Akechi had tried *everything.* He felt as though he'd passed through the five stages of fucking grief, with all the emotional baggage he'd been dealing with since that fateful day. The boy had attempted to simply accept it, but his mind wouldn't allow that. Too many questions. So, he had attempted to receive answers...or, he wanted to do that. But every time he hovered over the call button, or saw her in public, he began to shake, panic, sway. He was afraid of learning the truth.

Within a few days, Akechi became the very thing he hated. A coward.

He shook his head, ridding it from his mind. That was something he wasn't ready to come to terms with, yet.

Instead, Goro took a deep breath, and sat in a specific, wooden in amongst metallic chair. It was the one part of his apartment that didn't look completely stale. Old, potentially capable of giving splinters, and not the most comfortable- but it offered colour to a blank slate. He couldn't bring himself to get rid of it.

Infact, it became his favourite chair. He often sat there if he needed to think about things, come to conclusions about work, or personal troubles. Today was the latter, and Akechi hoped that this chair would assist him.

How pathetic, relying on a chair. He occassionally had that thought, but it was the least of his worries.

Sat as comfortably as possible on such a discomforting seat, he placed his head in his hands and began to think.

"So, it goes like this..." He began, mumbling to himself, the only noise filling the otherwise stagnant air. "I, Goro Akechi, shot an innocent girl's father, and took his life. I then proceeded to almost die...but survived, due to unreal circumstances, and a certain boy's unending determination. Meaning that this girl ended up seeing me again...and again, and again. And so, she..."

He paused. It was still so absurd, what he was mulling over saying.

"She...forgave me. She didn't hate me forever, she didn't try to kill me, she didn't make my life a living nightmare- she just forgave me."

And knocked me out cold, he thought, but decided to leave that line in his head.

"She forgives me, and wants to be...my friend."

Akechi concluded that he was supposed to smile at that point...but he scowled, instead. This was...wrong. All of it, wrong! This wasn't how it was supposed to go!

"She should want me dead, or atleast harmed." Goro felt a familiar feeling in his stomach, but ignored it. "That girl should be at my door with that axe of hers, desperate for vengeance," the sensation got worse, but it remained unnoticed. "she lost her family that day...if it were me, I'd-"

His hand swept up to his mouth, as he finally understood the feeling that had now risen to his neck. He had hardly eaten recently, there was no room to afford losing any more sustenance. Attempting to catch his breaths and relax his distressed body were, as it says, attempts. He was hardly succeeding, and the panic was rising in his throat each and every second, reality slamming into him more and more, gripping on him like an unbearable force, and he thought back to her iron grip, and he wanted to do something new, try a last resort in amongst all his other attempts at resolution. He didn't know what, maybe he wanted to sob, maybe he wanted to scream, maybe he wanted to throw up, maybe he wanted to do something else that he couldn't possibly say. But he couldn't, so instead, Akechi picked up his phone...

...and dialed Masayoshi Shido, even if he couldn't answer.

(Ring, ring...)

He began to feel tears fall, warming his cold cheeks, despite his wishes. He felt so weak, yet there was nothing he could do to stop it now.

(Ring, ring...)

He despised Shido. Yet, he seeked him for help so often, in the past, and now...he couldn't even do that. Standing up from the once comforting chair, he stood in silence, letting the ringtone fill the air.

(Ring, ring...)

Not even the one most happy to help him would do so now. Even if it was manipulation, he had been there...but nobody was here anymore. Nobody that he felt worthy of speaking to.

(Ring, ring...)

It was impossible to silence his wails now, so he gave up, and crumpled to the ground, pained sobs drenching the room.

(We're sorry, the recipient can't answer the phone currently. If you would like, leave a voicemail after the beep...)

He would have killed her, if their roles had been swapped. A truth he was terrified to admit to, but one he can no longer deny.

That is why Goro Akechi knows that he doesn't deserve her forgiveness.

The fog began to lift, but life remained clouded and unclear for the detective...and the grey was blocking any light that may have been at the end.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry goro :(
> 
> prequel to this coming soon! itll all make more sense when it comes out :D


End file.
